Introducing September Starring Carrie Coon
Carrie Coon was photographed on film in New York by Julia Sariy at Rosa New York. She was styled by Alicia Lombardini; assistant stylist Cyrenae Tademy. Makeup by Rebecca Restrepo ; hair by Jordan M, and manicure by Maki Sakamoto. Interview by Alison Engstrom. C-Print by Andrew Thompson at Meadow Darkroom.
Hello Carrie! You’ve had such a colorful and exciting career and I'D LOVE to TALK TO YOU ABOUT INTUITION. HOW HAS TRUSTING YOUR INTUITION LED TO WHERE YOU ARE TODAY?
First, it takes a long time to figure out how to do that as a woman. I think we are discouraged from saying no from a very young age, which prevents us from actually listening to what we want. For so long, many young women have made decisions according to what they think other people want them to do and who other people want them to be. I think we are extremely good at compartmentalization.
When my grandmother was in her seventies, she was on the phone with a widower who had lost his wife. This man had been calling her regularly and just monopolizing her time because she was too nice to get off the phone. She finally said to him while I was sitting there, I'm so sorry, I actually can't have this conversation right now. I have to go. She hung up and turned to me and said, Carrie, if you can learn to say ‘no’ now, you will be so far ahead of me because I am in my seventies and I'm still trying to figure it out. I thought of her as such a strong woman because she really was extraordinary. My grandma was a science teacher, and she would take her kids outside to shoot off rockets. She would get in trouble because she was wearing pants and doing experiments with her kids. People would say to her, you can't wear pants. And she said, I am climbing ladders. I'm going outside. I'm wearing pants. Had I not learned that I would have become a terrible and wonderful liar. That's what I became, only because I had no connection to my intuition. I was completely incapable of advocating for myself and that didn't change until I was 30. That was the year everything started shifting.
I would say I’ve always had good intuition about projects. I knew which projects were well-suited to me. When I had the opportunity to audition for Virginia Woolf, at the main stage at Steppenwolf Theater in Chicago in Edward Albee's Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf, I thought, this is mine, only I can do this and I know how to do this. I really wanted it. I was in my apartment, I slipped on some pearls, and I got some brandy. I walked around and said all the lines out loud.I had never worked that way before. I was very much a cerebral and intellectual actor reading books around subjects. I had never done anything so embodied to prepare for a part but I had this feeling that what was needed in order to get into her body. And sure enough, I got that part. And that changed my whole life, including meeting my husband, who was also in the play. He was a showman, as we call it in the business. I knew that for the first time I could see a future and for the first time in my life, I trusted that no matter what I had to share or say, I was with a partner who could handle all of it. It was probably because he was 15 years older than me and had already lived so many lives. That's when I was able to embrace my gut instincts.
above Carrie is wearing a dress by Salon 1884; shoes by Tamara Mellon; earrings by Odette; rings by Alessandra Camilla Milano and Natasha Schweitzer.
I feel like intuition and gut go hand-in-hand and it gets more polished as you get older. What have you learned about following it or trusting your gut?
I feel that the clarity that comes with becoming a mother has sharpened that intuition because you don't get to practice. The practice we get is what our parents inflicted on us and then learning by mistake. You're reparenting yourself in a way. You're taking the things that work and sometimes unsuccessfully, you're repeating patterns and you're catching yourself.
I have great and loving parents, but every family can be complicated. I’ve realized since I had kids, I was good at it and I was a good mom. I had good instincts. My husband used to say, boy, there's really no reason why you should be good at this, but I think you are; of course, as a mom, we're never entirely satisfied by what we're doing. We always feel inadequate in every capacity. Women are wearing a lot of hats. Being a mom has given me a lot of clarity, not only about just the kind of people I want to help facilitate my children to be but also seeing the people who are right in front of me, which I didn’t feel was always possible in my own life. I wasn't living in my body whole and I don't want that for my children.
above Carrie is wearing a full look by Nili Lotan; earrings by Odette; rings by Alessandra Camilla Milano and Natasha Schweitzer; shoes by Alexandre Birman.
How has that shaped the decisions you have made?
With the kind of work I take, it's so clear to me what's worth taking and what's not worth taking.I always respond first and foremost if the material is well-written. My husband is such a tremendous sounding board and I have to say those instincts out loud still. In order to own them fully, I have to have them reflected back to me by someone who knows me well. Tracy has such good taste and it’s helpful to have that.
There are the undeniable jobs that come along. When the possibility of doing White Lotus came up—every actor is trying to get on it—I had the opportunity to audition for it. I said, I really want to do this, but I can't go to Thailand for five months. I shouldn't even make a tape for this and he said, this is the job and we will figure this out. If you get this job, we'll make it work. And we did it. It was really hard.
above Carrie is wearing a dress by Alejandra Alonso Rojas; jacket by Bevza; earrings by Alessandra Camilla Milano; rings by Michael M and Alessandra Camilla Milano.
Did your kids come with you or did they stay back?
The climate over there was so hot. I mean, climate change is really in your face in a place like that. When we were working, it was often 114 degrees. The UV index was 13 or 14, which means you burn in a matter of minutes if you go outside. I couldn't get tanned because you're not supposed to change color while you're shooting out of order. Also, I was going back to the Gilded Age, plus, I don't want skin cancer. So I would stay inside from nine to four. I wasn't going to bring my children to Thailand to sit in a hotel room with me or to fly for 22 hours. The longest flight in the world is from New York to Singapore. So we opted to keep them at home. I did that trip so many times. Anytime there was free time in the schedule, I flew back to the United States. People asked if I traveled, and I said I went home and did laundry, cooked meals, went to the grocery store, and drove my kids around. I have good instincts about material. I have enough humility, maybe being raised in the Midwest, to know what's mine and what's not mine. I'll read something, I'll say, oh, these three people would be amazing for this job.
Speaking of that Midwest, mentality as a fellow Ohioan, have you ever been told you dance around things like confrontation versus being direct like it is in New York?
You're not going to make anyone uncomfortable openly. You're just going to stoically, make your way through it no matter what the consequences are. I had this experience the summer of my junior year of college. I came to New York for the first time and I worked at the Best Buy in Long Island City. I was a Spanish major and I spoke Spanish at work all day. Every single time someone came up to the customer service counter and I said, hi, they said, oh, you're not from here are you? It was so intense for me, too. It is actually helpful and very efficient.
above Carrie is wearing a dress by Alejandra Alonso Rojas; jacket by Adam Lippes; earrings by Alessandra Camilla Milano; rings by Michael M and Alessandra Camilla Milano.
What was the biggest step you took that changed your career course?
The real first step was giving myself permission to go to graduate school and to act at all, which violated all of my Midwestern sensibilities of practicality and being sensible. Outside of my personal experience, I didn't have any training to speak of before I made that decision. The rest of the time in an acting career, you're waiting for people to choose you. You're not making any decisions. You can say no to an audition, but you're not doing that early in your career. You're saying yes to everything, I mean, I believe that's what you should do. You should just say yes to everything if you can. I think just deciding to embark on the journey, too, and then it's been this bizarre, slow, and steady march.
I’m somewhat sheepish to say this but so often one of the questions you get as an actor is, what do you do when you go through periods when you're not working? How do you keep from going? How do you keep your finger in the craft? And I just say I haven't had a lot of time like that because I was in the theater working steadily. Once TV and film opened up, it's been pretty regular in spite of all of the other uncertainty and instability around me or the industry. I feel very workmanlike in my trajectory.
I think you also have really good energy. The day of the shoot was so much fun!
It’s such a shame we don't go in person for casting anymore.
It’s such an intangible part.
Yes, it is. Whenever I have the opportunity to talk to students, one of the things I remind them is that it is an act of generosity to share your work and your obligation in that moment. Whatever room you're walking into, especially if you're auditioning, is to bring your love into it. Anything else makes you smaller, self-conscious, tiny, and unwilling to take up space. But if you lead with love and a feeling of sharing and also receiving, then you change the energy in a room.
Now to talk about His Three Daughters. Your performance is incredible. The whole cast is amazing. I have four sisters and maybe it was my sister intuition but I knew from the get-go who was the oldest, the middle, and the youngest. Do you have any sisters?
I have one sister and three brothers. I'm the very middle of five and my sister is adopted from El Salvador, and she’s a year and a half older than me. We've always had more of an older-younger sister dynamic with me feeling like the older sister to her.
above Carrie is wearing a full look by Lafayette 148; shoes by Alexandre Birman; earrings and rings by Odette.
What resonated with you the most about the project when you were presented with it? And can you talk more about your character, Katie?
Well, first and foremost, my husband had worked with Azazel Jacobs already on two films and he was a friend of ours. I know Tracy had such a wonderful time working with Aza and as soon as he reached out and said he had a script to hand-deliver to me, Tracy said, well, you're doing it, before I had even read it. What was so flattering was he shared he had written the part with me in mind, just as he had written the other two parts with Lizzie (Elizabeth Olsen) and Natasha (Lyonne) in mind. He had reached out to them and they were on board. There was already this extraordinary assemblage of actors who were willing to take on this script that was being handled so tenderly.
He didn't want any digital version of it out in the world. He didn't even want us sharing it with our agents. He wanted us to experience the story, just actor meeting story, without any influence to make sure we felt fully engaged.
I'm such a Katie, I have that energy in me. I can be very controlling. I absolutely believe if my siblings did everything I said, their lives would be better and it annoys them (laughs). They know that, too. I'm the middle child, so I've always been brokering relationships and keeping the peace like middle children do. Yet, also functioning very much like a responsible oldest child taking on things and feeling very resentful because no one notices all I’m doing so I immediately relate to Katie. It seemed like I could see my way into her immediately. It’s interesting to read the script in its entirety because for example, Lizzie's part, Christina, I found really opaque and challenging and I thought, I'm glad I didn’t have to do that, so the casting was spot on.
You really do play the older sister who is steering the ship. I kept thinking, she's going to keep bringing up the DNR until it’s signed.
What can I control? I liked the way Aza wrote her because she's also really responsible, but also so emotionally immature, which is infuriating to be around that person who never sees you. They always see their image of you in front of them, and that's what they're speaking to. It is maddening to have someone talking to you that way. And I just thought Aza captured that so beautifully.
One of the things I took away— and I learned later on in life— was that even though siblings can grow up under the same roof, each is going to have a different experience.
It really is wild. My brothers, who were seven and nine years younger than us, may as well have grown up in an entirely different household.
There can be a certain complexity of sisters. The film explores connection, the desire for connection, but not being able to connect, which can be heartbreaking. Is there a message you want audiences to take away?
I think people will see what they need in a movie like this. I wouldn’t have the audacity to suggest what I think someone should take away. However, what I love about what it's offering is it feels so real. Even though there's this magical realism in the third act, the apologies are inadequate. The connections are brief and poorly expressed. There isn't this heartfelt conversation where everyone speaks their piece. It feels incomplete and I think that’s what people are responding to; it’s one of the things I love about it. Even though it's heightened on some level because it's very language-heavy for a film, something about it feels grounded in the way real people speak to each other. The relationships just feel really specific.
I want to touch quickly on The Gilded Age. Congratulations on your Emmy nomination for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series, amazing!
It was amazing. Our crew had been working so hard, so it was a nice shot in the arm to get some recognition for the show because period pieces are hard. Everybody works really hard to pull those together.
What are you the most proud of about the series? Because it is so beautiful—the locations, the costumes, everything is just so incredible.
It does look really beautiful. You could watch it with the sound off and get a lot out of it. For me personally, it's the ensemble; it’s like family. Our crew, even though we were down for about 18 months, almost all returned to us. They've all known each other for decades. All the theater people on the show have worked together off and on for years and years. That’s the best kind of job to have. Everybody takes really good care of each other. Everyone's looking out for each other and we just laugh.
I walked into the hair and makeup room the other day and something had happened and they were all just on the floor laughing. And I said, it feels like we've already been doing this for five months. We had five months in energy, even though it had only been two weeks. I had a hard time those first couple of weeks because I had just gotten back from Thailand. I'd had no rest, and I had 48 hours between flying home and then starting on The Gilded Age, but it wasn't supposed to be like that. I was supposed to have a couple of weeks. Kids don't care about jet lag, production doesn't care about jet lag. I said to them, you guys, I'm so sorry. I'm going to be really slow. I'm going to need extra time. I just can't quite find it. I always say it feels like putting on a wet bathing suit. I know it's a bathing suit, but it feels uncomfortable to wear. You feel bad and like everything you're doing is terrible and you're going to have to be so loving.
How do you stay inspired between projects?
I meditate. I have to say I was meditating a lot in Thailand because my children weren't there. When I came home, it was much harder for me to keep up that practice, but it is something I absolutely believe in. I have to exercise or I go a little crazy. I'll do this tuneless humming or I'll be singing and my husband will say, I love your singing, but you need to go exercise (laughs). It's an energy that builds up in me that starts to feel like anxiety if I don't move my body around.
follow carrie coon on instagram
stream ‘his three daughters’ on netflix september 20th or catch in select theaters
stream season one and two ‘the gilded age’ on hbo
A special thank you to this team and Narrative PR.